Thursday, November 27, 2008
A Message From Baby S
First and foremost, we are thankful for J and Baby S. For a couple of so not great parents, we have been blessed with two amazing children. Although they were born over two decades apart, in two different countries and under completely different circumstances, we are amazed at how similar they are. That is one incredible gift. We are proud of the adult J has become and are looking forward to Baby S maturing into an equally decent human being. In return for our good fortune we promise never to pit you against each other, to always provide unconditional love and support you on your endeavors. When you two are happy, we are happy.
Our day began with an early morning phone call from J. He and his girlfriend S recently moved to a new apartment, in a much safer part of town, and this made us very happy. Sadly, J could not join us for Thanksgiving because he had to work. He will also be working on Christmas day, but assured us that he will be here on Christmas Eve. Last year he got Christmas day off, so it’s time for someone else to spend time with his/her family. We are excited about his visit and especially his time with Baby S. Little sister has been missing him so much that she no longer fixates on the Mama picture in her Who Loves Baby photo album. Now she goes to J’s picture and kisses it. I know, stinkin’ cute.
Then as we were getting the stuffing ready and about to pop the bird in the oven, we received a phone call from Grandpa. Yet another reason for us to be thankful. A later event in the day made us appreciate Grandpa more than ever. He has accepted my children without reservation, and although we have had our moments, the man does not hold a grudge, nor engages in petty behavior. We are very fortunate to have him in our lives. We talked for over an hour and were very surprised when he offered to meet us in San Francisco in a few months. Got to get the granddaughter fix.
Abuela and Abuelo were visiting one of J’s and Baby S’s cousins for Thanksgiving, so we left them a message at home. All three of us said something and P had to be a show off and say “Feliz Dia de Accion de Gracias.” He knows my mother eats that stuff up and is devilishly trying to make a liar out of me (regarding his monolingual status). It’s OK with me because I much rather have my mother getting along with my husband and truly liking him, than having her mount a one woman attack filled with hatred. We are thankful for their presence in our lives. Although they live far away, they keep in touch by phone and e-mail. Abuela informed me last week that she is visiting in March to celebrate J’s (3/21) and Baby S’s (3/15) birthdays. We were concerned that J would not be able to make it but he said that he would inform his supervisor that he would be taking time off in March to visit with his Abuela. Also, looks like she’ll get to meet Grandpa when we meet in San Francisco.
While Abuela/Abuelo and Grandpa have not met, they have something special in common, they share two grandchildren. All three have been very generous with their support and unabashed love for J and Baby S. The adoption process is filled with many painful moments, and having someone understand that is priceless. To Abuela/Abuelo and Grandpa, Baby S was real the moment they were informed about our decision to adopt. It was their granddaughter, not a concept or something to be ridiculed. They began using her name immediately, and gave us hope when we were depressed about the long wait. At times things were so bad that I could not even discuss the wait with my mother. She would send me an e-mail and just remind me that our daughter was coming home and that she was certain that it would be a perfect fit for our family. They all shared in our joy when we received the referral and keep up with us via this blog, enjoying every picture, video and silly story posted. Again, we are thankful for their love, support and enthusiasm over the many boring things we do.
As I mentioned before, P has been working overtime and those hours finally caught up with him. Add to that the 2-3 nights that Baby S has used him as a kicking bag, and you have a very tired BaBa. So we did a lot of nothing and P did his part getting the house and the food ready for dinner. The weather was perfect, and we spent hours outside watching Baby S play. She realized very early that BaBa was not going to work and she was elated. Paragons of good parenting that we are, we allowed her to play in her diaper and bare feet. She played with the many dead leaves on the lawn and kept yanking blades of grass and placing them on her head.
It was really nice to sit outside and just enjoy our baby girl. Baby S even played for an extended period of time with her back to us, something that would have never happened a month ago. She is at her best when she is with both of us, you can tell that her confidence level increases significantly. I am so going to miss my little snuggle bug when I return to work.
I will be writing about the rest of the day in a new post, because this post is about good things and I do not want negativity amidst all the good things that we enjoyed.