Friday, December 05, 2008

To blog or not to blog.

I am going to quote a very wise blogger, “This has been one crap-tastic week.” :) Happy to say that last night things turned around. We are looking forward to a great weekend. Not sure how that is going to happen since we have to get ready for Christmas and we are way behind. However, we are determined to chase the blues away and enjoy what we have.

During lunch on Wednesday, I told P that I seriously considered deleting the blog that morning. His reaction? He glared at me, nostrils flaring and through gritted teeth stated, “Don’t you dare!” I reassured him that the blog was still there but that maybe we should go password protected. That earned me another glare. At that point I decided that my children do not deserve their mother becoming a homicide statistic, so I told P that I was only weighing our options.

When we created the blog, our main reason was Baby S, because in the end, it is all about our daughter. That is why the blog was dormant for two years. We were not interested in writing about the depressing wait. One downside of adoption from China is the lack of knowledge about our child’s history, but this is something we knew and accepted. Our way to cope was to make a commitment to document what it’s like to bring Baby S home for her future reference. It is not a commitment that we take lightly. P reminded me of this very important reason.

Password protection might be an option in the future but right now it impedes another purpose of this blog. During our wait, we followed many blogs dedicated to Chinese adoption. These complete strangers who were sharing their lives with us were key to our survival. In some cases, we followed the parents through the wait, the joy of referral, travel to China, meeting their child, journey home and subsequent adjustment. In some cases, those little girls we first got a glimpse of at a year old are now entering kindergarten. We learned a lot about the process from them and are grateful.

In return, we decided to pay it forward and keep the blog for at least a year and then reevaluate. This debt of gratitude is not something we can forget when things get tough. Other than friends and relatives, we only made our blog address available on an adoption website when we received our referral. Until recently, we thought that only friends and relatives visited to keep up with Baby S. As it turns out, Baby S has received visitors from Canada, Spain, Ireland, Italy, China, Australia and various US states. I hesitated about posting this information, because I did not want to spook any lurkers out there. We are aware that they are finding us in an adoption website and we want them to follow along. We are also pretty sure that they have either adopted from China or are in that hell known as the wait. If any of you ever have any questions, feel free to send us an e-mail and we’ll do our best to answer.

Since this is the Story of Baby S, it is written through the prism of her parents’ experiences. It is a letter to our daughter. Since it is all about her, we are going to stick around for a while.

This afternoon, we are going to engage in some serious hypocritical parenting. We are going to take our daughter to talk to a complete stranger. Not only that, but we are going to encourage her to sit on his lap and have her picture taken with him. Please wish us luck because we are sure going to need it. We have wanted to get professional photos of Baby S since we arrived home, but know that she’s just not there. The allure of Santa Claus won us over and we are going to take the plunge. We doubt that she’d smile but P valiantly volunteered to sit on Santa’s lap (don’t fret, I’ll be there snapping away) and then get out of the shot. Never thought I’d hear my husband say that, I owe Baby S big time. We most likely will end up with pictures of a screaming baby. Baby S, your parents are going to add extra funds to your therapy fund. On Saturday, we are going to get our tree and take Baby S to her first parade. We hope everyone has a fantastic weekend.

I'm going to get you!

Who, me? No, of course I'm not going to run out to the middle of the street. Go back to what you were doing. I believe that you had your backs to me.

I have no idea what happened with this picture. P took it and I thought my phone was broken. Thankfully, no other pictures like that and we think it looks kind of cool.


ruthieaya said...

Hi baby S:
Hoy te tomaran la primera foto con Santa Claus, y para esta foto te sentaran en la falda de el. Pero se que mama y baba estaran a tu lado para darte apoyo y puedas sonreir. Se que no es facil para una bebe que siempre ha estado solo con su papa y mama sentarse en la falda de un estraño, Santa Claus.
te deseamos mucha suerte
Abuelo W y Abuela R
God Bless You

Michelle said...

"Baby S, your parents are going to add extra funds to your therapy fund" . Ha! That was funny. My IPhone did that to one of my pictures too. So strange!

P.S. I was totally trying to translate the message from ruthieaya with my meager high school spanish class language skills so I could read what it said. I'm nosy like that. Still have no idea what it said. :)

Can't wait to see the screaming, uh I mean, Santa picture!