Thursday, July 02, 2009


I have never been into hats. I own only one cap, and I use it when I am out in the sun, and only because I know I should be a role model to my kids about sun exposure. That, and the fact that my huge and grotesquely shaped head prevents me from wearing 99.9% of the hats in the market. P has yet to wear a hat that does not look great on him. Thankfully, the kids take after him.

Yet during the wait, I was unable to keep myself from buying hats for SS. I also bought a lot of pink, even though I intended on dressing my daughter in primary colors. Goes to show you that SS broke me long before she came home.

In China, we could not get SS to wear hats. While it was hot and sunny, we knew it was not the time to take on that battle. SS had her life turned upside down, the proverbial rug pulled from under her; who cares about hats and sun exposure? Her denim hat went with us everywhere, and we used it when she was asleep. Futile effort to keep prying eyes and (yuck) hands from her. The rest of the time, P and I choreographed our bodies to shield SS from the sun. Talk about team work.

At home, it was the same, even though we kept trying. It is one of the reasons we were not out and about last summer. We had a lot of fires, and I think we had a 117 degree day (and many in the 100s) after we came home.

Then winter came, and we were really worried about SS's hat phobia. We had to get out and she had to be protected from the cold. Only SS could do such an about face. She LOVED her ski caps and mittens. We had to hide them from her, because she would bring them to us and insist on wearing them indoors.

SS is now into hats and that denim number we toted around China (among many others we packed and never used) finally fits. Last September, we took about 100 pictures of SS (one sitting) with that darn hat, and got only one decent shot (below). That is how much she hated hats. An added benefit of her acceptance of headgear is that it is helping us to keep her from being aware that she is being ogled. I hate to come across as petty, but it makes life so much easier. It is helpful to SS because she can concentrate on being two, looking around, exploring her world, but not hyper aware that she is constantly watched (by strangers, not us). So wish we had done this since we arrived home.

We skipped play/swimming time today. SS has been really clingy and whiny, and we want her to rest. P has the day off tomorrow, and we are headed to the water park, to let SS OD on her poison, water. SS's mood lead to a double whammy for me, due to her fragile state. We went to C0$tco and twice, SS said "help me, Mama, help me." On both occasions, she was in the cart, right by me. Two women wondered out loud where her mother was and why would she leave her alone. SS was clearly calling me Mama, and clearly reaching out to me. But they both insisted on asking and looking for her mother. I AM her mother. When I told P he was really shaken. Sometimes he is so dense I can't understand. Then sometimes, like today, he says the right thing. Not for public consumption, but he articulated my fears, reassured me that those comments would not damage SS, because, let's face it, our kids are brilliant and the world is way behind them. Heh. Thanks Baby, I really needed that.

Today, happily sucking on the smoothie addiction Abu created. ;)

The one decent pic we got, and because P was behind the camera. It is one of our favorite pictures of SS.

Poor SS tried to eat the hat to keep us from torturing her by making her wear the hat, and then forcing her to pose.

One year ago...
We were in a frantic dash to get ready for our departure to China on July 4th. There was sadness, as we always envisioned JJ by our side. That hurt so bad, but he was working and unable to join us. Still hurts today, but we take comfort in the incredibly strong bond JJ and SS share. P and I have astoundlessly and happily witnessed their strong bond develop.

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